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Business, Coaching, Featured

How To Get What We Want! (Not What We Don’t Want!)

Written by Sterling Mire

When we are preoccupied with worries about the future, we are actually helping bring those fear-based thoughts into reality.

When we say or think to ourselves what we don’t want versus what we do want, we are breathing life into the very thing we are trying to avoid. It’s been ingrained in us to push, fight and resist against the things we do not desire in order to bring forth that which we do desire. We were actually taught the opposite of what we should be doing to bring the desirable into our lives and keep the undesirable out of our lives. This is why we tend to obsess about what we are trying to avoid.

I always emphasize, when working with clients, that the key to creating and ushering in our heart-felt deep desires is by first allowing, not resisting, what is currently our situation. What we resist persists.

For instance, if we are feeling financially pinched, yet we desire abundance, we must first acknowledge, “what is so” and accept it, without making it bad or wrong. When

we are simply able to accept it as the current circumstance, without creating stories around it, we are exercising non-resistance, therefore, we stop the persistence of the situation, in this case it’s scarcity. Now that we have stopped the “growth” of scarcity, we now have a clearing, a space, for creating that which we do want: abundance. Now, abundance has the space to not only be created, but to flourish!

This is one of the essential keys to manifesting. Without it we will just be spinning our wheels, going nowhere fast.

Can you list some of the things you would like to have or experience in your life that seems to be eluding you? Occurs to be unattainable? Can you identify what you are resisting about that situation?

Consider this: everything you want wants YOU! There is nothing in this world that is standing in your way. No circumstances, no people, no hindrances, limitations or constraints that you have not created yourself, consciously or unconsciously. If you are the only one blocking you from experiencing your ideal life, then the good news is you are the only one who can change all of that! When we consciously create, we can move mountains in seconds and achieve each and every one of our utmost heart’s desires easily, effortlessly and joyously! Once you’ve tapped into this magical realm you’ll be completely amazed at how life actually works and how so much of what you previously understood was actually backwards.

And, consider that you can have everything your wildest imagination can think up and that you already possess everything you need. All you need now are the tools and know-how to tap into your version of heaven on earth!

 

 

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Coaching, Featured

The Source Disconnect

There are times when we unconsciously disconnect from the source of all creation in an effort to escape pain that comes with confronting our issues.

There are times when we feel helpless and ineffective in our lives. These are the times we become disconnected from the source of all authentic creative expression. Often the reason for this is self-sabotage.

We unconsciously, yet intentionally, separate ourselves from our source of power rendering us powerless in our own lives. It is all done in an effort to avoid painful issues, although, these issues are calling to us to pay attention, work through, and therefore experience a breakthrough that takes us to a new plateau in our world. This new level of existence allows us to feel stronger, become wiser, become more successful and understand the inner workings of life and our true purpose in life. When we align to our soul’s purpose and take on the challenges that come with our lives, we become more empowered to create that which we are truly excited and inspired to experience.

By unconsciously choosing to disconnect and interrupt the flow of creativity from our source, you are actually choosing to sleepwalk through life and our vision for our lives and future become hazy and scattered. Our creative source has not abandoned you, it was you who chose to abandon it. The choice to reconnect is and always been solely your choice as it was when the choice was made to block and unplug from the source of all creation. Dr. Wayne Dyer goes on to say in his article, “Spiritual Disconnect”., “Ask yourself this key question, “How do I feel most of the time?” If your answer is that you feel anxious, anguished, hurt, depressed, frustrated, and so on, then you have a spiritual disconnect.

When we come back to the source, we are coming back to our true selves. This gives us a sense of being profoundly related to reality, security and the ability to see our lives clearly. We can reconnect by taking ourselves to a place that inspires you like nature. We can also engage in activities that allow us to feel fully alive. What is it that touches, moves and inspires you?
When were the times you felt centered, profoundly blissful and alive? Make a list and work from there. We can also create a powerful intention to reconnect with a 5, 10, 30 minute meditation where ever we are. If you live a busy life, try my Meditation on the Go exercises. They are pocket-sized meditations but deliver powerful results in just minutes.

When we’ve lost our connection to the universe, our sense of purpose, direction, fulfillment and satisfaction in our lives become non-existent. We may also feel a total lack in our lives: lack of love, lack of energy and a lack of motivation. Yet, we can always remember who we really are by restoring our connection whenever we are ready. When it’s time to come alive again and soar we will be experiencing a whole new level in life richer in experience and knowledge, less fearful next time we are called into looking at our lives and confronting what’s not working.

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Coaching

Do People Really Make Us Happy?

It appears that people can make us feel a range of emotions; happy, sad, angry, frustrated, euphoric, disappointed, depressed and the list goes on. The truth is this is an illusion. We live in a society that has convinced us that happiness lies outside of us, within our environment and through the things we accumulate. Here is a perfect example of how we have learned this way of understanding life’s happiness. A mother sees her young child crying. The mother enthusiastically offers the child a cookie. The child then seeing his/her mother smiling (happy) makes the association with the cookie as an object that possesses happiness. We could take it a bit further and look at how the cookie has an effect on the child’s brain reinforcing the idea of where happiness lies. Let’s look at the effect of the sugar in the cookie. Sugar is known to light up the reward pathways and cause a surge of feel-good hormones, like dopamine, to be released. As a result, we feel good and “happy”. The child easily confuses the cookie, or any other thing the child learns to associate with happiness, as where happiness lies.

People’s Energy DOES Have an Effect On Us

True. We are all energy. We transmit energy. We receive energy. Yet, energy changes all the time so if someone’s happy and we feel the effects of it we begin to associate thatthat is where happiness lies. We begin to confuse, once again, where happiness lives. “That person makes me happy!” or “That person makes me upset”. It may not be that we consciously want to blame or hold someone accountable for our state of being. It could be that we simply are confused as to where happiness truly is.

Taking Responsibility

Taking responsibility for how we feel is one of the most valuable lessons we can learn in life. Choosing how we feel is a conscious action. We must be fully aware to make this choice. Noticing how we feel is the first step. To choose how we want to feel in a way that is authentic and actually works is to first allow what is so to be. To simply allow it to exist. Allowing is not agreeing. Allowing is allowing. Once we allow what is, then we can make a conscious choice to choose how we want to feel. Once you choose an empowering emotion, take a moment to connect to what that feels like. Experience it fully. Maybe think of a happy memory and relive it. Embrace the feeling and let it wash over you and sink in. Then proceed with your life. It is quite simple but where people go wrong in choosing their emotions is leaving out the acceptance, allowing something to be as it is. What is surprising is that whatever undesirable emotion was being experienced will simply take care of itself and disappear.

True Happiness

Happiness is our birthright. Happiness is a skill. Like all skills, it must be practiced. When you have true happiness within, you are totally fulfilled and the things you engage in are not perceived as a pathway to lead you to happiness but an adventure you can embrace fearlessly with joy and out of the sheer excitement of being alive!

To discover more about happiness, I recommend a current documentary on NetFlix simply titled: “Happiness”. Filmmaker Roko Belic travels to more than a dozen countries, searching for the meaning of happiness.

Sterling is a celebrated professional life coach and a nationally published author. She works with clients all over the world. Her practice is located in Beverly Hills. For more information, please www.getyourlifenow.com

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